A deeply intimate caress
The lilting sound of your voice
You never can feel the stress
I'm left with very little choice
The sweet passionate embrace
I can feel your calloused hands
Watch the tears run down my face
My will died with your demand
Your broad hips against mine
Always able to steal my reserve
Somehow you crossed that line
I suppose i got what I deserve
The hot passionate touch
Sweet whispers resonate in my ear
How did I learn to hate you so much
The newest reason I fear
Never will my heart be opem
I know eventually I will heal
Words of forgiveness never spoken
Time will change but it doesn't seem real
Oh sweet man inside
It seems as though your excyses break
Bend me until I want to hide
Was your love for me only fake
Do you really disregard my love
The touch was beautiful left me gaping
Your not a broken dove
The way I feel was like a raping
Of my heart and soul
The incomplete disregard
Have you met your goal
To remove my strong guard
I.
CAN'T.
RESENT.
YOU.
This fact breaks me in two
Asshole, I really fell for you.
Sunday, February 6, 2011
Thursday, February 3, 2011
Trust
I trusted you
Allowed you into the depths of my heart
It was impossibly painful when we had to part
Seems like I am just another mistake
Restless nights whilst i lie awake
The endless torments you bestow
They make me want to blow.
I can hardly concentrate anymore
When you left me, I felt like a whore
Why do i still crave your touch
Sometimes I care to much
The disgust of self, fills me with rage
Like an animal begging to be freed from its cage.
The allure of past addictions
Your words feel like a contradiction
The swelling pain in my breast
I want to rip my heart from my chest
How dare you question my love!
If anything it was a gift from above.
11:07pm Feb 1 2011
Allowed you into the depths of my heart
It was impossibly painful when we had to part
Seems like I am just another mistake
Restless nights whilst i lie awake
The endless torments you bestow
They make me want to blow.
I can hardly concentrate anymore
When you left me, I felt like a whore
Why do i still crave your touch
Sometimes I care to much
The disgust of self, fills me with rage
Like an animal begging to be freed from its cage.
The allure of past addictions
Your words feel like a contradiction
The swelling pain in my breast
I want to rip my heart from my chest
How dare you question my love!
If anything it was a gift from above.
11:07pm Feb 1 2011
Untitled # 2 February 1
The irradication of thought.
The scandal unseemingly caught
The lust for normality returns
The unsettling emotions reprieved.
The dip into a rythmical reality
Cynicism fading from empty eyes
Loss of self will and righteousness
Salvation has come but at a cost.
The process of moving forward
Aching Hearts pierced by a sword
8:58 pm Feb 1 2010
The scandal unseemingly caught
The lust for normality returns
The unsettling emotions reprieved.
The dip into a rythmical reality
Cynicism fading from empty eyes
Loss of self will and righteousness
Salvation has come but at a cost.
The process of moving forward
Aching Hearts pierced by a sword
8:58 pm Feb 1 2010
Wednesday, February 2, 2011
Untitled #1 Feb 1st
The soft rifling touch,
Easily turned to a painful strike
The pain and betrayl burning through our blood
Are we the forsakened ones?
Cursed by the beauty
Sin swirling in the eyes
Being decieved by the alowing voddies
The ill fates broke us
For what did we do to deserve this pain
The unmistaken identity of the gods
In human form
How can we break these shackles
Free ourselves from this hurt
For it was not I who asked to be bestowed with this alleged gift?
It was not I who asked to become a whore for all humanity.
Finally it was not I who asked to be robbed of my opinion.
Hark I cry out for salvation
when may i redeem these simple gifts.
The gifts of love deliver
When may I stop hiding in fear from my emotions
February 1st 8:48pm
Easily turned to a painful strike
The pain and betrayl burning through our blood
Are we the forsakened ones?
Cursed by the beauty
Sin swirling in the eyes
Being decieved by the alowing voddies
The ill fates broke us
For what did we do to deserve this pain
The unmistaken identity of the gods
In human form
How can we break these shackles
Free ourselves from this hurt
For it was not I who asked to be bestowed with this alleged gift?
It was not I who asked to become a whore for all humanity.
Finally it was not I who asked to be robbed of my opinion.
Hark I cry out for salvation
when may i redeem these simple gifts.
The gifts of love deliver
When may I stop hiding in fear from my emotions
February 1st 8:48pm
Tuesday, February 1, 2011
Long Lost
The long lost uncanny feeling of love
the confusion built up inside the heart
how could she allow this to overcome her
she is the warrior.
The protector the savious,
she deigns to tend to his needs
but he wont notice her never notice her
the wilting flower with out water,
the pent up anger,
she desires him
a deep burning desire that brings her to her knees,
she is unsure what to say,
how to express herself,
how can she keep hiding from him
She must
remain self preservation
She cant take the thought of the rejection
she is already aware of how he feels
and knows that there will be no result in her favour.
She is strung like a thread braking under extreme tension,
she wants to be freed,
but these bonds are heart deep
she doesnt understand how she could have developed these feelings.
What can she say?
What can she do?
Should she wait for his feelings to change...
the confusion built up inside the heart
how could she allow this to overcome her
she is the warrior.
The protector the savious,
she deigns to tend to his needs
but he wont notice her never notice her
the wilting flower with out water,
the pent up anger,
she desires him
a deep burning desire that brings her to her knees,
she is unsure what to say,
how to express herself,
how can she keep hiding from him
She must
remain self preservation
She cant take the thought of the rejection
she is already aware of how he feels
and knows that there will be no result in her favour.
She is strung like a thread braking under extreme tension,
she wants to be freed,
but these bonds are heart deep
she doesnt understand how she could have developed these feelings.
What can she say?
What can she do?
Should she wait for his feelings to change...
the known reality.
The true and simple fact is.
You will never know who you are.
I can write about you,
The way you hold yourself,
You dont know me
You wont know me.
The impossible is that way for a reason,
I could ommit a high treason,
Rob your heart,
May i hold it.
Deceiver,
I can never be the reliever.
I am so confused.
How could i allow this to happen,
You will never know who you are.
I can write about you,
The way you hold yourself,
You dont know me
You wont know me.
The impossible is that way for a reason,
I could ommit a high treason,
Rob your heart,
May i hold it.
Deceiver,
I can never be the reliever.
I am so confused.
How could i allow this to happen,
Linger
I linger in your prescence
A ghost of who you are.
You cannot see me because you allow
The blindness to over come you
Cant I show,
No
Out of the question,
I will hide,
Quick gazes holding my breath
The way my heart secretly quickens
Your touch,
Scent,
Why dont you notice the little severity,
the way the gravity pulls.
--
A ghost of who you are.
You cannot see me because you allow
The blindness to over come you
Cant I show,
No
Out of the question,
I will hide,
Quick gazes holding my breath
The way my heart secretly quickens
Your touch,
Scent,
Why dont you notice the little severity,
the way the gravity pulls.
--
Hold your hand
My secret to you.
I secretly crave to hold you.
I ache to touch you.
I wish you could see me.
I am trying not to hide.
But its seems like an amusement ride.
I want to hold your hand.
Let me hold you when you cry.
The pain written on your face makes me want to die.
I want to kiss you
But it wouldnt be true.
No it wouldnt,
Immoral in your eyes,
It makes me want to cry.
Dont you see i would die.
I would die for you.
No thoughts just 2.
The 2 simplicities.
Of these diverse words.
Your eyes call them to me.
How can I respond.
There the simplest of words.
Love me
Perhaps,
Hold me,
Maybe,
Kiss Me,
Possibly,
Save Me.
Yes those words...
Save Me.
I am coming sweet child.
Be strong for me.
>>>> if only you knew who you were
I secretly crave to hold you.
I ache to touch you.
I wish you could see me.
I am trying not to hide.
But its seems like an amusement ride.
I want to hold your hand.
Let me hold you when you cry.
The pain written on your face makes me want to die.
I want to kiss you
But it wouldnt be true.
No it wouldnt,
Immoral in your eyes,
It makes me want to cry.
Dont you see i would die.
I would die for you.
No thoughts just 2.
The 2 simplicities.
Of these diverse words.
Your eyes call them to me.
How can I respond.
There the simplest of words.
Love me
Perhaps,
Hold me,
Maybe,
Kiss Me,
Possibly,
Save Me.
Yes those words...
Save Me.
I am coming sweet child.
Be strong for me.
>>>> if only you knew who you were
gritty sleep.
my nightmares rip me from my bed, causing me to flail like a helpless ragdoll, i fall down before the gods and curse, how could you inflict this pain on me. I commited no sin against you, no high treason. yet everytime i close my eyes, my adernaline spikes and all i can pray for is the moment i wake up or the time to stop the pain to stop. I feel you feel it feel him, i cant, it smothers me, smothering me silently. Heavy noises, panting, breathing pain, abused the scare the loss the fright the hurt you ripped from inside me. why didnt you just kill me i wouldve preferred that, i really would have, instead of having your spider fangs dip into my sub concious every night. causing me to be jumpy, the untrusting heart, the heart that will no longer trust those who have inflicted pain upon me. i dont understand, i am unsure of the rare occurances where i dont have these thoughts, these memories, the venom poisoning and corrupting all thought process that i have, the irk, the feeling, i cant stand to feel this i am unsure of where my reality is, i dont know how i deserved this. am i that mistake the one you wished never happened.
How can i do this, abused, drugs, sex, drugs, booze, rape, drugs, loss, choices, change, no more drugs, booze, loss, its all so different so diverse. Break me please break my heart, itd be less painful than that. or would it. lovers sought between the closest embrace ruined by the deep infectious memories, i cant give unto him, them, the lovers because i am so afraid, so scared your face everywhere i turn i see it. I dont dare walk towards that area of my life alone, i want love the man the pain to dissipate, the... the...
How can i do this, abused, drugs, sex, drugs, booze, rape, drugs, loss, choices, change, no more drugs, booze, loss, its all so different so diverse. Break me please break my heart, itd be less painful than that. or would it. lovers sought between the closest embrace ruined by the deep infectious memories, i cant give unto him, them, the lovers because i am so afraid, so scared your face everywhere i turn i see it. I dont dare walk towards that area of my life alone, i want love the man the pain to dissipate, the... the...
forbidden passions
She is walking, alone the beautiful woman, the forsaken warrior, the lone wolf, the unloved one. She will encounter a proper lover so she hopes. many of times she has died, to be reincarnated later on in life she has been bent and broken. she is unsure, she is seemingly fearless, fighting with every breath not to have to put him down.
She becomes confused, lost she is unsure of her self, at the cross roads, between life and death, the loss and sadness plague her everyday existance, she utters soft words and hopes for him, for some one to save her.
Will she find her salvation, will her saviour come through, as the days pass once again she nears the end of the world, deciding she must bear the weight of the world on her shoulders, heal the broken, cure the emotionless, aid the ill.
When she steps out of the dreamy state of her life, she realizes perhaps in death, in death it is better, she does not dare weep over a man, for she will not be weak, she let the men break her and it shall happen no more.
She becomes confused, lost she is unsure of her self, at the cross roads, between life and death, the loss and sadness plague her everyday existance, she utters soft words and hopes for him, for some one to save her.
Will she find her salvation, will her saviour come through, as the days pass once again she nears the end of the world, deciding she must bear the weight of the world on her shoulders, heal the broken, cure the emotionless, aid the ill.
When she steps out of the dreamy state of her life, she realizes perhaps in death, in death it is better, she does not dare weep over a man, for she will not be weak, she let the men break her and it shall happen no more.
uncanny realisations
3:08 am..
im sitting here...
i dont know what to do
this mental epitome of bliss
like a lovers forgotten kiss
the seemingly ungrateful bastards
breaking thru my guards.
the grippin pulsating reality,
the brutal description of words,
the unexplainitory insanity of life.
The hearltessness and wrecklessness
the unsensical rhythmic flow of this little piece
the heaven to be unspoke of for it is a sin
the cancer eats at your body,
the forsaken lover fiending for your demise
the loss of the simple things.
hope doesnt exist anymore.
commone sense doesnt. the confusion
the brain that has shut down
splurs out random verses of feelings,
emotions unsure of unsaid
the feeling inside of the insanity,
why are you insane..
i mean why am i insane
are we insane,
why are you causing me this pain.
mistaken brutally.
lied to naturally.
lost painfully.
broken in scruitiny.
whats left..
im sitting here...
i dont know what to do
this mental epitome of bliss
like a lovers forgotten kiss
the seemingly ungrateful bastards
breaking thru my guards.
the grippin pulsating reality,
the brutal description of words,
the unexplainitory insanity of life.
The hearltessness and wrecklessness
the unsensical rhythmic flow of this little piece
the heaven to be unspoke of for it is a sin
the cancer eats at your body,
the forsaken lover fiending for your demise
the loss of the simple things.
hope doesnt exist anymore.
commone sense doesnt. the confusion
the brain that has shut down
splurs out random verses of feelings,
emotions unsure of unsaid
the feeling inside of the insanity,
why are you insane..
i mean why am i insane
are we insane,
why are you causing me this pain.
mistaken brutally.
lied to naturally.
lost painfully.
broken in scruitiny.
whats left..
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